Are you wondering if you should keep paying for dates in a relationship?
Have you been the one to continuously pick up the bill even after the first date? Whether you’re in a new relationship, or a long-term one, dates should be paid for by both partners.
Who pays for a date can be an awkward topic to bring up, however, you should discuss it to ensure the person you’re dating is in line with your views. If boundaries are not put in place, conflict can arise and create tension in your relationship.
In this article, we will delve into whether or not you should keep paying for dates in a relationship. We will also expand on if a guy should pay for the first date, and when a woman should start to pay.
Should the guy pay on the first date?
If a guy has asked a girl out on a first date, he should be the one to offer to pay for the occasion. However, the girl should not assume that it will be covered, and have the courtesy to at least offer to contribute. This is quite a controversial topic, with many different views on the matter.
Some believe a man must pay for the first date, while others think it’s okay for the bill to be split between the two.
Who picks up the charges could be decided by who was the one to invite the other person out, whether it was the guy or girl.
Studies have shown that 63% of men believe that they should be the ones to pay for the first date, whereas only 46% of women thought the same.
In this day and age, it’s more important for the woman to at least offer to pay towards the first bill. As a relationship progresses, there should be a balance where the guy and girl cover the dates equally.
A survey has found that 44% of men will stop dating a woman who never offers to pay.
We cannot answer; ‘should the guy pay on the first date’ with a definite answer. Different views will come into play on this matter.
We can conclude that the guy should cover the first date, however, the girl should at least make an offer to pay. Whether he accepts or declines, will be completely up to the guy and what his views are.
When should a woman start paying for dates?
After the first date, a woman should expect to start paying for dates or at least make sure she covers half of the bill. If things start to become more serious, the girl should no longer assume that the guy will be the one to cover the costs. This will, however, change depending on the dynamic of the relationship.
If a woman initiates the next interaction, she should think about covering his charge too, especially if he paid for the previous date. This is dating etiquette, which we can sometimes disregard when we assume the guy should pay for the date.
More often than not, individuals forget to consider another person’s financial stability, specifically when they first start to date someone. It can be an awkward topic that couples in the early stages of a relationship may not feel comfortable speaking about.
Whether you’re a new couple or in a long-term relationship, costs should be split equally between the two of you.
If you feel like you’re constantly the one picking up the bill, you should have a conversation with your partner about this to let them know how you feel. They may not have realised it bothers you, or perhaps they think they pick up other expenses. Either way, you should discuss this topic.
Should I keep paying for dates in a relationship?
No, you should not keep paying for dates in a relationship. If you’ve only just become a new couple, boundaries need to be put in place. This will ensure you share the cost of dates and activities between the two of you. This creates an equal partnership and gets rid of any assumptions that a man needs to cover all expenses.
When you go out with your friends, you do not expect them to keep paying for you. You will either split the bill or have a balance where you will share occasions between yourselves. This should not be any different in a relationship.
Many households will raise their sons in the traditional ways of dating. The man has to pay for the first date and even cover most of the social interactions that follow.
This is becoming less frequent as modern-day society is more about gender equality in relationships.
What is gender equality in relationships?
Gender equality in a relationship is sharing responsibilities between the man and woman. This includes a balance between each partner paying for dates. This can be on different occasions or a split on the same bill.
In some relationships, bills will be split equally but will depend on how much money each partner makes. If the guy earns less, he will pay the lesser amount.
Gender equality in a relationship is erasing the idea that the guy needs to pay for everything. It will eradicate any stereotypes that come with gender roles (the man should go to work while the woman stays at home).
How often should couples go out on dates?
Couples should go out on a date at least once a week. This is important to maintain as well as expand on the connection between two individuals. Date night once a week will help keep the spark ignited and prevent any feelings of uncertainty in a relationship.
If every week is a bit much due to busy schedules, once a month is also okay. Anything less than this could be a sign that your relationship may need some work.
This can vary depending on how your relationship is. Some couples only see each other a few times every couple of months due to travelling, or perhaps you already live together and have multiple date nights a week.
Why is it important to have date nights?
Date nights are extremely important for communication between couples. It has positive effects on a relationship. These include;
- An increase in affection
- Improves gratitude towards your partner
- Builds on the attraction
- Helps eradicate any feelings of uncertainty or concern
Date night does not necessarily have to be a romantic dinner at a fancy restaurant. Activities that bring couples closer together, such as something adventurous or playful can have more of a positive impact on a relationship.
It’s more about how your partner feels during the interaction with you, than what the actual date is.
Conclusion
In this day and age, it’s pretty clear that a man paying for the first date, and those thereafter is a controversial topic, and can be debated depending on what your views are.
If a guy has asked a girl out on a date, he should expect to pick up the bill, however, a lady should at least offer to pay half. Once the relationship progresses and becomes more exclusive, dates should be split between both partners.
You may come from a household where you’ve been brought up to always cover the bill if you’re the one who’s initiated the date, this is completely fine too. It all depends on your own opinion, however, this should be in line with the person who you’re dating. If it’s not, conflict may arise if you do not openly discuss it with each other.